I stand amazed in the presence of God this day. I am constantly bowled over by how God puts together pieces of my life, and it’s in the looking back that I can see just how involved He has been in my entire journey. All of it – even in the silences. I pray He’ll guide me through this blog journey, because I know there’s a reason for it. I know I’m putting all this out there for someone. He is real, He is active, and He is simply waiting for someone to come to Him. He’s waiting for that one to seek Him with their whole heart, that they may be constantly bowled over just as I am. I feel certain I am to detail my journey step by step, so someone can follow me right into the arms of Jesus. Because you know what… although I became a child of God in February of 1997, it was not till very recently that I came to understand just what it is that Jesus did… for me. Someone else may need to understand it, too.
Do you have your journal yet? If you’re not already one who journals, please start. It is completely eye opening when you look back. I didn’t begin a journal until the Spring of 2010. Now, I have ten completed journals (composition notebooks), and I have just started my eleventh. The eleventh is my journal review notebook (of the previous ten journals). I have two other notebooks I just started, one entitled “God Moments,” and the other, “Answered Prayer.” I wanted something special for those occasions, so the BIG things wouldn’t get lost in the other journals. I also have a journal dedicated to Scripture memorization. I don’t put Scripture in until I’ve memorized it. This one I began in December. I also have a journal dedicated to my little boy. I’m recording special prayers and the things he’s said to me. Perhaps I’ll pass this on to him when he graduates from high school. I also have a notebook dedicated to book ideas. And in addition to all these journals, I have completed three manuscripts since the fall of 2011. All this writing from someone who never, ever had any inclination to do so.
It was on March the 1st that I began my God Moments journal. I thought it would commence with the Spring of 2010, just as my journals do. But I realized I had to go further back. That’s because I became a child of God in February of 1997. This is where it all began with God & me, and so that was the first recorded God moment. He saved me through His Son, so that is the most important God moment. Because if I didn’t have His Son, I wouldn’t have Him. To become God’s child, I had to have faith… faith that God is who He says He is, and faith that Jesus is who He says He is. This is where it all began. Faith.
Soon after becoming a child of God in 1997, I began helping my pastor’s wife with the Acteens (a group of teen girls who learn about missionaries). You know what… those teen girls should have been teaching me about God. They knew far more than I did, as most of them grew up in church. I knew NOTHING! I knew the basics… I was a sinner and in need of Jesus to save me. That’s it. I didn’t know anything else. And yet, I jumped into a leadership role. Now, I wasn’t the leader… I was assisting someone else. But in hindsight, I had no business doing what I was doing. I didn’t even know what I was doing… I should have been sitting in church, soaking up God’s word. See, faith comes by hearing and hearing by the word of God (Romans 10:17). But because I immediately jumped into activity, I didn’t hear as much of God’s word as I should have. And so, my faith wasn’t built up. I was too busy.
And so, it’s no wonder that when my husband and I moved away in January of 1999 that I simply fell away from God. Because my faith had not been established. I had the basics, but that’s it. And because I wasn’t grounded in my faith, it didn’t take hold. Over time, my faith dwindled away to pretty much nothing. Activity first drew me away from God, and then, I moved away and completely left Him out of my life. Oh, we did join a church when we moved to Pennsylvania. But my heart wasn’t in it. We then moved three more times, attempting half-hearted searches for churches along the way. However, the searches never amounted to anything. And so, it was not until around November of 2004, seven years after I became His, that I find my next God moment.
When we moved to Pinehurst, North Carolina, I again attempted to find a church. Unlike in previous years, the very first church was it! Immediately, I felt a connection with the people and with the pastor. My husband went with me the following Sunday, and I was shocked when he filled out the visitor card to include both our phone number and our address!! This was completely unlike him. And you know, although it doesn’t really sound like one, this was in fact a God moment… my second. But you would have had to know me and my husband, and who we were at that time in our lives, to see what a God moment this truly was. And what blows me away is that God is so faithful. Even when we’re not… even if we’re away from Him for over five years. And I was, because I had left Him behind.
I’m thankful God led my husband and I to that church in Pinehurst. Because while there, we began to hear the word of God again. We enjoyed that church so much, we jumped in with both feet. We made friends and took part in Sunday School. We took part in discipleship classes and began to hear God’s word on a consistent basis. And so what happened next was only natural… my faith was built up. It’s as if I picked up with God right where I left off years earlier. God did not let me get too far before pulling me back to Him. He remained faithful, even when I was not, and gave me just what I needed when I needed it the most. He does that for all of us.
And so today, I know… my journey began with faith, and it will end with faith. And what happens in between faith to faith has a lot to do with where I am today.
For in it the righteousness of God is revealed from faith to faith; as it is written, “The just shall live by faith.” Romans 1:17