Who may ascend the mountain of the Lord? Who may stand in his holy place? Psalm 24:3
This afternoon, I had a moment of doubt about what I was doing. Because I have been writing about struggle, and turmoil, and strife. I even had the song “Trouble” by Ray LaMontagne rolling around in my head. It’s a beautiful song… a man sings his heart out about his pain. Trouble following him since the day he was born, and worry won’t leave him alone… but he was saved by a woman. And that woman, she won’t let him go. Do you know what I hear in that song? God. Because Jesus said in this world we will have trouble, but to take heart for He has overcome the world! Trouble is a part of our lives. But it’s not a woman who will save us. It’s Jesus. He is the One who will not let us go.
It was this afternoon when I read a comment on the blog about being thankful and counting blessings. And for a brief period, I felt uncertain about what I was doing. Because all I seem to write about is struggle… not blessing and thankfulness. For some reason, I cannot seem to break through all the strife. Why? Why am I stuck in the valley, when I want to be on the mountain with God? What purpose does the trial, and my writing about it, serve? Wouldn’t it be more effective to write about thankfulness, and counting my blessings? Wouldn’t that bring more glory to God? Wouldn’t uplifting blogs encourage someone all the more? Am I coming across as a whiny, baby???
And God reassured me. There is purpose. He reminded me of my dream. It was birthed in the summer of 2011, and has grown to all consuming proportions in recent days. I want to write because I am passionate about God. He is the One who instilled that passion within me. He is the One who is transforming me into something more… for Him. But along the way, there’s struggle. And so, what comes out is the truth about God and me. And right now, I have trouble. Right now, I’m in a valley. And you know what? I feel deep in my heart that most people out there are living in the valley, too. But, I’m on a journey. I’m ascending a mountain with God, and I want other people to come along with me. I want other people to know what I’ve learned, and what I’m learning. Because it took oh, so long to get just where I am now… and there’s a mountain to climb, and endurance is required. Yes, I’m passionate about my struggle. Because I know in my heart, I am not the only one who feels the same.
Yes, I have a dream, and God reminded me of my dream today through two separate sources. I read an article entitled “5 lies that keep us from dreaming” in the P31 Woman magazine. And after my recent blogs about “Desire,” I just have to share what I read: “Your dreams aren’t about you, they’re about what God wants to do in His kingdom through you.” “So right here, right now, take back your God-given permission to dream and to follow the desires of our heart.” And, “the ‘more’ your heart has desired is what God has wanted to give you all along.” I also read a devotion from a book called, “Fresh Grounded Faith,” by Jennifer Rothschild. The topic? Follow your heart… she talked about Martin Luther King’s famous speech of August 28, 1963. She said that the speech almost didn’t happen. See, Dr. King had a dream, and he talked about it, wrote about it and shared it. Communicating his dream was his passion. And so, his advisors worried that the phrase, “I have a dream,” had been overused. They thought that it might lose its impact, if you can imagine that. And so, Dr. King did follow the new speech; however, before he came to the end he strayed from the transcript. He began to follow his heart, and speak out of his passion. And he said, “I have a dream…” The rest is history, as they say.
Martin Luther King had a dream. And his dream was God’s dream… Dr. King said, “I have a dream that one day every valley shall be exalted, and every hill and mountain shall be made low, the rough places will be made plain, and the crooked places will be made straight; “and the glory of the Lord shall be revealed and all flesh shall see it together.” May we all have just such a dream. And when desire gives birth to passion, may we know that it was God who placed it inside us.